As many of you saw on Facebook Amanda and I took a some time to play a little golf for charity. As of today, the tournament is now proudly named “The Bill LaMotte Memorial Golf Classic” and is put on by Kiwanis of Columbia. It’s the third year I’ve participated in the annual tournament and I can report that this is a well run, first class event at Woodcreek Farms. The funds benefit the Ray Tanner foundation and this year was the largest turnout ever.
In years past my friend, Kiwanis member, and lender partner, Becky Craven, put a team of four dudes together and we all had a great time. This year was going to be a little different. Becky wanted to play, which meant Amanda was getting thrown in a cart. “Confuse me??” you might ask. Yes…Amanda Payne was going to play golf. Real golfer and team member, Thomas Shumpert, rounded out the foursome.
Now, let me set the stage. Becky and I thought she would just drive the cart and hang out. NOPE! After all, other than perhaps a Myrtle Beach Putt-Putt had Amanda ever held a golf club in her hand in her whole life? No. A ball? No. Had she ever made a golfing motion? No. While walking on the 2nd green did she ask me, “OMG, are we allowed to walk on this?” Yes. While walking towards a deep bunker miles away from the hole did she ask, “What do we need? That sand putter? Is that it? Do we need that?” Yes. (Mind you no one hit out of the sand all day). About halfway in did she ask, “If I call in a pizza will they find us?” Maybe. On a par 3 over water did she ask, “Can I just throw mine in the water right there?” Yes. Did she ask again, addressing Ray Tanner? Yes. It being a Captain’s Choice tourney she wanted to contribute every shot (like any good teammate would, of course), and that was going to be her shot. She ended up playing the shot in the traditional golfing sense, hit it straight, and yes could’ve thrown it further with her left hand in the lake. For the record, all of our balls went in the drink. I just looked up and it’s 3:08AM, but I could keep going. Getting back to driving the cart, she didn’t drive one flippin’ inch.
My awesome wife, Jennifer, who played on the boys golf team in high school and regularly kicks my a**, supplied Amanda with clubs and a shirt. We picked up a black visor and 110 used balls on the way to the course (@ Target) and there you go. #Golfer.
For weeks Becky and Amanda have been talking about winning the tournament and never understood why Thomas and I constantly responded, “It’s not happening.” I’ll tag myself as the weakest link as Thomas hit a ton of long bombs and Becky and Amanda kept most of the balls they hit straight down the pipe. Amanda is still waiting on a trophy, btw.
Big Thanks to Becky Craven and First Citizens for sponsoring the team! We’re ready for next year!
Hopefully we made the fine folks a First Citizens Bank very proud. We all have sunburns and finished dead last.
Thank you!
FJ
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